The Cabin in The Woods Review

The Cabin in The Woods is a horror movie that came out in 2012. It was directed and co-written by Drew Goddard and Joss Whedon both produced it and did the other half of the writing. It’s about five college kids who travel to a cabin in the woods for a holiday, unaware that people in an office building are controlling things from the shadows.

Now, this movie succeeds in acting, visuals, and comedy. This movie is ridiculously funny, and the characters are likeable and fun to watch, with the exception of Jules, who is an annoying, obnoxious idiot. Also, this is a small thing, but in my opinion, the Japanese schoolchildren you’ll see in the later part of the film are adorable.

However, while the movie does succeed on some levels, there are a few silly plotholes, and the ending is just ridiculous. First, the invisible force field looks pretty ridiculous. It would probably be more plausible to have Curt just crash into the canyon wall. Second, there is a reference to a drug prevention commercial at the beginning of the film, and only people who have seen the commercial will understand that the characters are just joking around. The people who haven’t will think that the characters are morons. However, the X-Files reference used later in the film, as people who haven’t seen that episode of it can understand why the character is saying the line.

Third, why is Dana’s death optional? If she didn’t have to die, then why did they even decide to make her go along? Wouldn’t kill the least amount of people be the best option?

As for the ending, I’m not a huge fan of the ‘pacifying Ancient Ones’ ending that the movie has. While I do like Cthulhu, I’m kind of getting sick of him and his pals. Personally, I think it would have been a better film if the twist was that they’re testing all these dangerous and powerful things on the kids so that they can get more data on them before locking them away for good. Or something like that.

However, since there are some Ancient ones that need to be pacified, shouldn’t there be only one way to pacify them? You see various monsters in various countries, but isn’t there usually only one specific way to pacify huge, demonic monsters?

And finally, the fact that Dana and Max just let the rest of humanity die just so that they won’t have to die right there and then seems a little unrealistic to me. I doubt a normal person would do that, and their choice is made all the more useless when you realize that they will die along with everyone else, which is actually stated by the Director character in the film.

In conclusion, while The Cabin in The Woods is a fun comedy, don’t be looking for horror or excellent writing. You’ll find neither.

Why I’ll Never Be Able To Finish: The Evil Dead

The Evil Dead is a horror film that was made in 1981 and was written and directed by Sam Raimi. It’s about five college students who go to vacation in an abandoned cabin in the woods. However, things get ugly when the students find an audiotape that summons demons. While the film is very highly praised, this was one of the few films that I was not able to finish. When watching a film, no matter how scared or puzzled I am, I usually try to finish it so that I might be able to clear up an odd plot point or see if it gets better. However, I couldn’t keep watching The Evil Dead.

First though, the good points of this film. With the exception of one character, the rest are all likeable and fun to watch before the demons pop up. The makeup in this film is excellent, and the music, while not very memorable, sounds great and helps to accent the mood.

And that’s all this movie has going for it. Wait, you may ask, what about the horror? Is it good?

To be frank, this movie is not scary. It’s disgusting, as it uses gory dismemberment’s and one rape scene. It’s nausea-inducing, but not scary. It’s pretty much on the same level as torture porn. It’s that bad.

This film is also incredibly sexist. I know that horror films usually have one dumb chick or a dumb chick moment, but this film takes the cake. All of the girls in this film get possessed by demons and die horribly, while the two guys just die. Because all woman are possessed by demons and looking to kill you and your friends when you turn your back. Oh, wait, they’re not.

I’m also pretty annoyed by the tree rape scene in the begining of the movie. First of all, I have no idea who thought it would be a good idea to have some horny trees, as the only other movie that I can remember having them got a Golden Turkey award. Second, the way the characters react to it is terrible. The victim doesn’t tell them exactly what happened, which is fine, as that does happen in real life sometimes. What I’m mad about is the fact that her friends don’t seem that concerned, telling her that it was a wild animal, and even trying to convince her to stay when she wants to leave. Only one character tries to get her out, and he does it out of pity!

Even a moron with an I.Q. of fifty would be able to tell that the girl was hurt by something and that the place wasn’t safe. Sure, you may not be able to tell that it was rape at a first glance, but you would know that something horrible was going on and try to get to safety. These friends don’t, and they don’t show much concern about the girl either. This is horrible writing, and Raimi should be slapped with a dictionary.

So, in conclusion, don’t watch this film. There are much better horror films that will actually scare you.

Puella Magi Madoka Magica Review

Puella Magi Madoka Magica is a twelve episode anime produced by Shaft and Aniplex. It was directed by Akiyuki Shinbo, written by Gen Orabuchi, and drawn by Ume Aoki. It’s about a girl named Madoka who lives a pretty simple life with her family and friends, and always tries to do the right thing. However, her simple life changes forever when a new transfer student named Homura Akemi. Homura warns Madoka that if she tries to change her life, she’ll lose everything she holds dear. The warning turns out to be prophetic, as Madoka and her friend, Sayaka, encounter a white cat-like creature named Kyubey who promises to grant them one wish, which can be anything. However, in return, they must become Magical Girls and battle Witches, which are creatures that cause horrible things to happen to humans. However, the girls soon find that there’s more to Kyubey and being a Magical Girl than they anticipated.

Now, for the most part, the art and animation of Puella Magi Madoka Magica is gorgeous. I especially love how they experiment, as every Witch’s labyrinth will have a different animation style applied to it. It’s just brilliant, and if I had one complaint about it, it would be that the head-tilting that our heroines do looks odd and silly after awhile, as they do tilt their heads in odd ways quite a bit. However, it’s a small blemish on an otherwise jaw-droppingly beautiful show.

As for the characters, while they are fun to watch, they can feel flat at times, with the exceptions of Homura and Mami. They feel like they lack development and are a little hard to sympathize with at times. Don’t get me wrong, they are fun to watch, but when bad stuff happens to them, you want to feel sad for them..but there aren’t any hooks in them to make you feel sad, again, with the exceptions of Homura and Mami.

As for the music, it was all composed by Yuki Kajiura, so it all sounds gorgeous. However, there is one small flaw with it. In the first two episodes, the ending song is a sweet, upbeat track called See You Tomorrow by Aoi Yuki. While I understand the intent behind putting this song up for the first two episodes-which was done in order to hide the type of show that Puella Magi Madoka Magica is-it does not sound as good as Kalafina’s Magia, which is the best song in the show, and is so good that it’s even used as a battle theme sometimes. However, other than that small flaw, the soundtrack is beautiful.

As for the voice acting, the dub is..terrible. There’s no way of getting around that fact. The actors are trying too hard to be cutesy, and when you couple that with their wooden acting, it’s a recipie for absolute failure. The Japanese cast, on the other hand, sounds perfectly fine. While the actors are all cast to type, they make the characters sound believable and the voices won’t make your ears rot like the dub will.

As for the plot, it is a well-oiled tragedy, and one can easily compare it to Faust. The show takes one dark and sad turn after another, and just when you think you’ll be able to recover, the show stomps on your heart to splinters. It is that good.

Which makes it such a shame that the final two episodes-and the world of Puella Magi Madoka Magica itself-have huge, unforgiveable flaws. A quick warning here: if you plan on seeing Puella Magi Madoka Magica anytime soon, skip this part of the review. It all contains spoilers that could ruin your enjoyment of the show.

The first flaw isn’t really noticeable until you think about it, but Kyubey says that the emotions adolescent girls go through at that age are so strong that they can fulfill his goal. However, boys are also going through development emotionally, so why can’t boys be part of the action as well?

The second flaw of the series is how it tries to make sense out of how Madoka should be the strongest Magical Girl. Kyubey has an explanation for us at the second to last episode, but I’m not sure the explanation makes a lot of sense, and logically, Homura is the strongest Magical Girl, not Madoka.

As for the last episode, there are two weird things that make no sense in it. The first thing is that fact that Madoka talks to the dead about her wish and what she should do. The second thing that doesn’t make any sense is the sudden jump to space and the higher plane. Reading guidebooks does provide some insight as to what’s going on, but you never know why. It just all comes out of the blue.

However, I would be able to forgive the last episode and let those two things slide if Madoka’s wish wasn’t poorly executed. You see, her wish was to get rid of all past and future Witches by her own hands. In doing so, she becomes a god-like entity that no longer really exists on the same plane as humans. And you know what? I would be cool with that if her wish didn’t involve killing people.  When we see her go to a girl that’s about to become a Witch, Madoka cleans the Soul Gem, which would be awesome if that was all she did. But it isn’t. Madoka then smashes the Soul Gem, killing the girl. She is shown doing this to several people, and it’s implied that this is what happens to every Magical Girl that was supposed to become a Witch. This is made out to be a good thing until the final moments of the show, and quite frankly, it leaves a bitter taste in my mouth.

Now, cleansing a Soul Gem and getting rid of the fate of turning into a Witch is good. But I see nothing in that wish that states that Madoka has to break the Soul Gem as well. She could have just purified the Soul Gems, made a universe where the deaths of Magical Girls cure entropy, and left it at that. That would have made for a much happier ending, and since Gen Orabuchi was trying to make a semi-happy ending to Puella Magi Madoka Magica, I think this would have been the better way to do it.

All in all, Puella Magi Madoka Magica is a show well worth watching. It looks great, sounds great, and is a wonderful tragedy that will stomp on your heart. Just be careful of that last episode. It’s a bit of a doozy.

Cardcaptor Sakura Review

Cardcaptor Sakura is a six-volume manga written and drawn by CLAMP. It’s about a fifth-grader named Sakura who, after opening a book in her father’s library and accidentally releasing the magical cards in the book, gets magical powers from the cards guardian-a small creature named Cerberus and nicknamed Kero by Sakura-to recapture them before they cause destruction.

Again, since this was done by CLAMP, the artwork is gorgeous and adorable, and the number of costumes that they cook up for Sakura is astounding. Unlike Legend of Chun Hyang, the action scenes are drawn rather well and you can make out what’s going on in them.  As for the translation, it’s a little rough around the edges, as it uses honorifics and words like ‘onni-chan’ and ‘lovergirl’ sometimes. However, on the whole, it’s not bad, as you can read it and understand what’s going on.

As for the characters, everyone is fleshed out, even the teachers, which is a rarity for most magical girl shows, and everyone is fun to watch. However…there is one small subplot in the story that may bother older readers: the romance between Rika, a fifth grader, and her teacher, Mr. Terada. Now, I wouldn’t mind if this love was one-sided, with Rika liking Terada and Terada not liking Rika in that way, but it’s not, as Terada buys an engagement ring for Rika and tells her to take care of it until it becomes a wedding ring. Sure, what we’re shown of the relationship is pretty clean, but it’s obvious to older readers that Terada may be a pedophile. However, I will admit that this won’t be obvious to younger readers.

As for the plot, it’s solid and entertaining, but there are two flaws in it. First, why didn’t Kero or Kaho tell Sakura about the trial? Kero had plenty of time, so why didn’t he tell Sakura? As for Kaho, one could make the argument that she thought Kero had told Sakura, but if you look at Sakura, Li, and Tomoyo, you can tell that they have no clue, and since Kaho is watching them a lot, I’m not sure that this argument holds any water. The second problem is the fact that Kero didn’t tell Sakura what the disaster was before the trial. Again, he had lots of time on his hands, he could have told Sakura this information, as it is pretty important.

However, even though it does have some flaws, Cardcaptor Sakura is a fun manga to read, and it’s hard not to enjoy every second of it. If you haven’t read it already, go ahead and give it a try. Just try not to release the cards.

Serial Experiments Lain Review

Serial Experiments Lain is a thirteen episode anime that was directed by Ryutaro Nakamura, drawn by Yoshitoshi Abe, and written by Chiaki Konaka. The series is about a young girl named Lain, who doesn’t have many friends or computer skills. However, that all changes one day when people in Lain’s class get emails from a girl named Chisa, who had killed herself a few days earlier. Curious, Lain plugs in her computer, and finds that she also has an e-mail from Chisa, which says that after committing suicide, her consciousness went into the Wired-the shows version of the internet-when she has found a god. Even more puzzled, Lain digs deeper into the mystery, which involves her more than she realizes.

Now, the artwork of Serial Experiments Lain is gorgeous. While it does look old and gritty, it is highly detailed and looks great, especially the computers. The animation is smooth, allowing you to see everything on screen clearly.

Now, there isn’t much music used in the show itself, as the normal background noise sets the mood perfectly and can even send a shiver down your spine sometimes. The opening song is Duvet by Boa, which sounds beautiful and really fits the character of Lain and her plight. The ending theme, does also fit the character, but it doesn’t sound as great, as the singer is not as good.

The characters of Serial Experiments Lain are highly interpretive, but they are fun to watch, and I think the most likeable character in this show is Alice, and the most sympathetic is Lain herself. However, Lain’s sister, Mika, has a weird scene which is never brought up again. However, since she vanishes later on in the story, it’s not a huge problem.

As for the actual story of Serial Experiments Lain, it is a good story, but it’s so buried under references and trippy moments that the story and characters are highly up to interpretation, as no two people will view the show the same way, which is a bit of a shame, as the bare story is fine, but it’s so dragged down by old computer, science-fiction, and conspiracy references, philosophical ramblings, and trippy moments, that even people who like the show might not be able to understand it or parts of it. This sort of writing, in my opinion, makes parts of the show interesting and good, and other parts completely nonsensical.

However, in the end, I did enjoy the show, even if it is a bit weird. So, if you’re interested in it, take a look. It might be your cup of tea.

No Longer Human Review

No Longer Human is a semi-autobiographical novel by Osamu Dazai. The book is about a man named Oba Yozo who tries his best to live, despite being filled with shame and misery, as he cannot feel or understand human emotion. Now, you’ll notice that I said this book is semi-autobiographical. How is it? Well, other than the feelings of the main character, which may or may not be Dazai’s own, everything else is pulled out of Dazai’s life, as he himself was born in a rich family, failed at college, tried to be an artist, got wound up in odd political affairs, and tried to commit double suicide-he survived, the woman did not-before going on to becoming a famous author.

While it would be nice to find out whether or not the feeling in the book are Dazai’s, it’s almost impossible to do so. While No Longer Human was getting published in a magazine, Dazai tried to commit double suicide two more times. He failed the second time and succeeded on the third, making No Longer Human Dazai’s final finished book.

Moving on from the history of the story, the actual book itself is fantastic. The writing is captivating, as once you start reading, you won’t be able to stop. Oba himself is a sympathetic character, and the writing makes him seem so relatable that while you’re reading, you’ll start to think that you’re similar to Oba, even if you’re probably not. There are not plotholes or problems in this book. So, despite it’s tragic history and the fact that we’ll never know whether Dazai’s feelings were the same as Oba’s, No Longer Human is the kind of book that will suck you in if you give it a chance. I highly recommend it if you haven’t read it yet.

Why I’ll Never Be Able To Finish: Snow Drop

Snow Drop is a twelve volume manhwa by Kyung-ah Choi. It’s about a girl named Yoo So-na, who is forced to go back to school by her father. There, she meets Oh Hae-gi, a teen model who acts kind on the surface, but acts rude to who those who try to get close to him. From there, it’s the typical complicated love story between So-na and Hae-gi that you usually find in girls comics.

For starters, the artwork is just okay. It’s not beautiful, but it’s not so ugly that you want to rip your eyeballs out. However, the mouths do look weird sometimes, and bad hair coloring can make it hard to tell one guy from another sometimes.

As for the characters…they’re not that good. They’re not relatable or fun to watch, and the two main characters will constantly flip from hating each other to understanding each other. And of course, everyone has a tragic backstory. This is typical of most girl comics-no matter whether it’s a manga or manhwa-so it’s not that realistic or interesting, as it’s the same old stuff without anything new added in to make the characters interesting.

The plot is about the same. It’s the typical teenage drama and romance junk that you can find in almost any girl’s comic, and since the comic doesn’t try to throw in something new or make its characters interesting or likeable, it’s boring and predictable, which is why I won’t spend more time on this painfully boring and average comic.

Harry Potter and The Chamber of Secrets Review

Harry Potter and The Chamber of Secrets is the second film in the Harry Potter series. It’s about Harry’s second year at Hogwarts, which proves to be even more dangerous, as the legendary Chamber of Secrets is opened by Salazar Slytherin’s heir, and the monster unleashed starts petrifying the students.

As far as the acting goes in this film, it’s pretty good. However, I do have two complaints. The first is that the actor playing Ron makes the characters look and sound wimpy for ninety percent of the movie. I can forgive the scene in the Forbidden Forest, but there are plenty of moments before that scene that make the character look wimpy. The second is the fact that Harry says what he’s writing. While this isn’t a huge flaw, it is kind of weird.

As for the music, it’s wonderful, as usual, as it’s fun to listen to, memorable, and accents the mood perfectly. Now, I know I didn’t talk about the visuals in the first film, but I have to briefly bring them up here, as I loved how they did the Howler in this movie. I have no idea how they did it, but it looks awesome.

As for the plot, it’s good, for the most part. However, it does have some problems, and unlike the ones in The Sorcerer’s Stone, some of these can’t be ignored. First, how did Ron, Fred, and George know that Harry needed to be rescued? It’s not like Harry could send a message to them asking for help, so how did they know? Second, I have no idea how you become a teacher in the Wizarding World, but aren’t there a couple of classes or at least at test that you have to pass? It’s obvious that Lockheart doesn’t know what he’s doing, and any sensible person would fire him in a heartbeat.

Third, while the spider attack does look cool, why doesn’t Aragog stop his children from attacking Harry and Ron? They could help save Hagrid, so killing and eating the pair probably wouldn’t be in Aragog’s best interest. And finally, Harry knows that Lucius placed the diary into Ginny’s cauldron, so why doesn’t he tell Dumbledore or the authorities? He has multiple witnesses who could back him up-Ginny and Dobby-so why not tell someone?

However, while there are quite a few of problems in this film, it is not a bad movie. It’s not as good as The Sorcerer’s Stone, but it’s still an enjoyable experience. If you haven’t already, check it out, as this is not a bad sequel to The Sorcerer’s Stone.

Legend of Chun Hyang Review

Legend of Chun Hyang is a one volume manga written and drawn by CLAMP. It takes place in Korea and is about the energetic daughter of a medicine woman named Chun Hyang, who protects the villagers and her mother from the greedy ruler of the town whenever she can. However, Chun’s life changes one day when a traveler named Mong Ryong stops by..

Since this was done by CLAMP, the artwork is, for the most part, beautiful and easy to make out. However, it is hard to see what’s going on during the fight scenes, as it’s too blurry with speed lines.

As for the characters, all of them are memorable and fun to watch, especially Mong Ryong, who is the most interesting, as you never know how much of his goofiness is real or faked. However, I do have two problems with them. As the story goes on, Chun keeps yelling at Mong when he does goofy things. One, this gets annoying after awhile, and two, while these scenes are played for laughs, they are not funny at all. The other problem I have is that the villans in the second story aren’t as well developed as the ones in the first chapter and the bonus story.

As far as the plot goes, much like Clamp School Detectives, it starts out well, but falls on its face later on. Thankfully, since the story isn’t that long, there are only two major plot problems I can point out. First, in the bonus story, Chun’s mother hints that something unusual happened that made her husband die, but we never find out what, and the scene is never called back to in the rest of the story. The second problem is that Mong keeps saying that there are people he wants Chun to meet. However, we never get to see these people, and this bit of information seems to be waiting for a potential sequel that will never come.

In conclusion, if you really want to check out this manga, don’t waste your money on it. Get it at the library, as it’s a mediocre title worth a look but not a buck.

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone Review

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone is a fantasy film based on the first book in the Harry Potter series. It was directed by Chris Columbus, written by Steve Koves, and produced by David Heyman. It’s about a young orphan named Harry who lives with his hostile Aunt, Uncle, and his cousin, Dudley, who picks on him. On his eleventh birthday, Harry finds out from a giant named Hagrid that he’s actually a wizard, and can go to a school for witches and wizards. The rest of the film follows Harry as he learns more about his past, the Wizarding World, and what secrets his school has, all while making friends along the way.

To be perfectly honest, there’s almost nothing wrong with this film. The acting is wonderful, as everyone is believable, and fun to watch, even the child actors, which is amazing, as children can either be hit-or-miss in acting. The music sounds great, is memorable, and perfectly accents the mood whenever it’s used. However, the writing does have some plot problems, even though there’s nothing wrong with the dialogue.

First, what’s up with Neville’s broom? There’s a scene where Neville’s broom goes berserk, and makes him fall and break his arm, and at first, you think that it happened because Neville’s a bit incompetent. However, later on in the film, when Harry’s broom starts acting the same way, Hagrid says that Harry’s broom has been tampered with. So, this begs two questions: Who was messing with Neville’s broom? And why?

Second, why does Hermione lie about the troll? All she had to do was say that she had been caught up in the bathroom, and when Harry and Ron noticed that she was missing and ran to find her, they encountered the troll. It’s that simple! If she didn’t lie, they would have gained more house points. Third, in the chess game, Hermione, Ron, and Harry don’t realize that the game they’re playing is going to be exactly like wizard chess-which is pretty dangerous to the pieces, which they’ll have to become. However, they could have figured that out easily. There are broken statues littered everywhere to the side of the board. They could have just guessed at the danger and not wasted a valuable piece.

Also, Ron could have easily avoided being a human sacrifice in that chess game. All he had to do was get off the knight before he put the enemy in check. And, finally, how does Dumbledore know that Neville tried to stop Harry, Ron, and Hermione? At first, you’d think that Neville told Dumbledore, but consider this: Neville has been picked on in the film for being weak and stupid, so why would he openly talk about another failure and pour more fuel onto the fire?

However, the plot problems aren’t as harmful as I make them sound. They’re very, very tiny and don’t hurt the film that much. If you haven’t seen Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone, please do so. You owe it to yourself.